Death will surely come to me in the morning

No, I'm not writing about death, but rather about how insanely awful mornings are. Sure I understand why we have them and all, but who decided that I need to wake up and be part of them? Not I. Mornings = hazing.

Why hazing you ask? Well I'll tell you why. Because in this town the only people who HAVE to be at work at the crack of dawn are the "pledges." Those of us who haven't been here long enough to earn the right to sleep in.

It's not that I hate mornings totally, is that I hate mornings before 9 a.m.. Talk to me before 9, and I'm comatose/cranky/you-name-it. But really it's just that my brain is smarter than the rest of my body (go figure, right?), and thus it's still sleeping and does not want to be disturbed.

And someone needs to teach my assistant this. She's "Suzy Sunshine" in the mornings (and thus, she will continue to be referred to as such in the future). You would think I'm running over her cat or something the way she reacts when I give her a lackluster nod on my way in the door instead of the chipper "Hello! How are you today?" that she greets with me.

She doesn't think mornings are a form of hazing. She's one of those who doesn't even see hazing for what it really is. I mean she doesn't even complain when I make her do stupid things for me because I don't feel like doing them. Nor does she complain when people make her go and get things. She's hazed the most, and somehow she cares the least.

And that's the funny thing about hazing. Those on the bottom are most OK with it. They respect it. Which is totally why you don't hear about hazing most of the time. I mean of course people know it's going on, but no one talks about it.

Too bad when you're like me though, you realize how much hazing sucks. Too far from initiation to do things your own way, yet far enough from the bottom that you don't want to be lumped in with those who are there.

Life continues to be a sorority.